Right, my actual football team and my fantasy football team both suck this year, so I need some sort of distraction. Which means - naturally - trying to think of which superheroes would make the best football players.
The rules, because what's the point of thinking about this unless you overthink it?
- No weapons or external 'bits'. So surfboards, repulser beams, grenade launchers - out. Armor is ok, because that's on you, but you can't use it to shoot stuff from your hands or whatever. Natural defenses - claws and teeth - are fine.
- No pulling in stuff from off the field. (Also known as the 'Magneto Rule'.) You can't use your powers to bring on bleachers or chairs or passing 747s or anything like that.
- You have to fit on the field. So Galactus is out, and the all-Celestials defensive line is a no-go.
- Flight is ok, but the rules of football apply. You have to land with feet inbounds, etc.
- I think that's it. Further rules may apply when I think of them.
With no further ado, presenting five members of my imaginary team...