SETTING: THE SNUG KITCHEN OF THE CLEAVER HOUSEHOLD
Beaver: Mom! I'm stuck in the fridge again!
June Cleaver [from off-screen]: Oh Beaver! Not again! I'll be right there, after I see why my flower garden has mysteriously died.
[Wally and Eddy enter]
Wally: Hi Mom! Hey, have you seen the sky out there? My science teacher says that the Earth is being slowly drawn closer to the Sun!
[Opens fridge, takes out the milk, closes fridge. He doesn't notice the trapped Beaver - who takes a deep breath (AUDIENCE LAUGHTER).]
Eddy: Hiya Mrs. Cleaver! Golly, real shame about your garden.
[Helps himself to the milk.]
June Cleaver [from off-screen still]: I'll be right in, boys! I made some brownies with the very last of the flour...
Wally/Eddie: Oh boy, brownies!
June Cleaver [walking into room]: ...but don't drink the milk. Your father called to say that all the dairy cows have been infected with a deadly flesh-eating virus.
[Wally and Eddie spit milk back into their glasses while AUDIENCE LAUGHS.]
June Cleaver: Oh boys! I thought the gestalt consciousness raised you better than that! You'll never find a nice girl with that sort of behavior.
Beaver [from inside fridge]: Eeew. Girls.
Wally: Well, gosh mom, ever since all the men in the world started mysteriously dying, I figured my chances at getting a date would be so much better!
June Cleaver: Remember boys, even if it is the end of the world, there's no excuse for bad manners! Now, get your brother out of the fridge, else he'll be the only one to survive the atomic explosion.