[Jared's note: Although I'm a big fan of 24 (even the horror that was Season 6), I'm still not the biggest Bauer nut that I know. Fortunately, I scored a review from the most persnickety member of the Pornokitsch team - Mr Pickles.]
/horks hairball the size of a Buick
MWWWWORRRR. MWEORRR. MEWOORORRR. OOOOOOOOOOOO.
/thoroughly cleans butt with tongue
MWORRRR. ARRR! MWARRR! MWARRR!
/eats own body weight in chicken
/vomits in satisfaction